Tuesday, July 17, 2012

Sometimes People Say Mean Things.


    I had a good morning today. I woke up relatively late, did a few chores, got ready to head on over to work (which I was excited for since I haven't seen the kids I watch in weeks.) I made breakfast for the kids when I arrived and they headed out to play. I opened up my laptop and decided to check my blog stats: I was surprised to see I was getting an unusual amount of traffic from a certain website. When I see I'm getting a lot of traffic from somewhere, I like to head on over to check it out, say thanks, and then maybe return the favor by linking to them on my own blog as thank you. 

    Well, it turns out a thread had been started about my blog. A very hurtful, negative thread. (And before I go any farther I feel it important to note that I think this website is horrible...any sort of forum dedicated to saying hurtful things about other people should not exist.)  It was one of those situations where I know I should have just stopped reading but I couldn't - maybe you know what I mean. The main consensus of these contributors was that I am a silly nineteen year old (no arguments there) with an annoying and snotty way of writing that rubbed them the wrong way. 

    My first thought was to ignore them and move on without thinking about it ever again. After all, I've established a good relationship with so many readers and fellow bloggers and I love posting here every day so very much.  It occurred to me, though, that I should stop and consider the things that they said. Despite the fact that most of their comments were written with a startling lack of tact...could they have a point, even just a little? I think yes, and that's humbling and sobering for me. 

   It was never my intention to portray myself as snotty, know-it-all-ish or above anything, and if you have ever felt this way while reading my blog I am sorry. That is not what I want this blog to be about and so maybe those comments are well deserved and I can learn from them. (Well, except for the one who said she never read anything of mine because my face was too irritating...that was just plain mean.) 



     On a slightly different note, I don't want you to think I'm writing this post like a puppy with its tail between its legs.  I love blogging, I love talking to all of you and I'm grateful for the relationships I've established both on and offline because of this little piece of virtual space. I know this won't be the last time people say mean things - when you put your personal life on the internet for lots of people to read, it's bound to happen. I guess I'm just going to have to work on developing a thicker skin. 

   To those of you who wrote those things: I hope that publicly discussing things you hate about others has made you feel better about your lives, and that one day you'll be happy enough to go through each day without feeling the need to put other people down.  Let me offer you this free pass: If you don't like what you read here, click "unfollow," delete me from your internet history and forget my blog address. That's fine. Really, no problem.


To those of you who have continually been a source of inspiration, love and support around here...well, thank you so much for everything. 


44 comments:

Gaby said...

wow, what a horrible thing to stumble upon! good for you though for keeping your head high, haters gonna hate. indeed!

Sinead said...

Good on you! I like that you left a short but sweet comment on the forum. It makes me wonder what those people do all day if they have time to find peoples blogs, read enough to form an opinion, then bitch about it online...

Jay said...

For the life of me, I cannot understand those sites. I have no idea why someone would want to devote so much time to being spiteful. Imagine if everyone who spent time bashing people redirected that hatred into something productive.

Casey said...

Holy cow...I'm just astonished a website like this even exists! How sad. Some people just spew garbage to make themselves feel better, when in fact, it just makes them look like horrible, bitter people. Ugh, I'm beyond grossed out. But it's true, haters gonna hate! Good for you, rising above! It's your blog...they DON'T have to read it! Write what you love, dearie!

JC said...

I think its funny that someone wrote that your face irritated them. The first time I stumbled onto your blog I fell in love. I think you have a unique beauty, and a dazzeling style, and these both were things that drew me to your site an have now made me an addict to your posts.
Since the dawn of time people have been mean, for some reason it is just our nature. I think you made the right choice to read the comments and learn from them. You will never be able to please everyone, but there is always room for improvement.

Breenah said...

It's one thing to not like a blog, it's another thing to personally attack them under anonymity on a website. It's not like you're hurting anybody, which I could understand them lambasting someone for on that website. You seem to be taking it really well and I hope you can just get up and brush your shoulders off.

Erika said...

that is so mean!!!....Taylor swifft - Mean!just dance it of girl!Love your blog!

Anonymous said...

Wow. What is truly pathetic is that people dedicate energy to writing crap about other people rather than focusing on improving (loving?) themselves. You should unlink their website from your post. They certainly don't deserve any extra traffic being driven there. Pathetic. No other word for it.

Madison said...

Oh, girl! Preach it!

For every hater, you have dozens of people who love and adore your blog!

The Not Quite Military Wife said...

I'm so sorry, that's really awful of those people. You are great and don't let them get you down! You have many loyal readers who would be happy to prove them wrong.

Anonymous said...

Honestly why do you care? Does your life revolve around this blog? Put on your big girl panties and move on...

Sophie @TheForgeStyle said...

i think i know exactly which site you're talking about because one of my favorite bloggers has been one of their targets as well. it's ridiculous that so many people think it's ok to treat someone this way. just like you said, if you don't like it, don't read it ;)
keep doing what you're doing!

Megan said...

id never heard of these sites and wonder if i could be on there too ;) but regardless...BE FLATTERED. when someone takes their precious time to even mention or write about you...take it as the sincerest form of flattery.

my favorite word in the dictionary is the word 'remarkable'. the definition basically means 'something worth making a remark over'. good or bad to people...your blog and you are remarkable and leaves a lasting impression and i think that is such a great thing! keep doin what youre doin girl!!!

Anonymous said...

I can only laugh at the nasty people that sit around bad mouthing other people, LAME. I'm posting anonymously because I think my blog kinda sucks and I'm not ready for the criticism from that site. Your response is awesome, your blog is great, you are much cooler than anyone that keeps going back to a blog that they dislike so much xx

B. Grow said...

That is so awful! I can't believe people do that. What's the point? Does it really make them feel better to say hurtful things about someone they don't even know??? So messed up. I'm very sorry. And if I could punch a website it would be that one. You're right. Haters gonna hate. You're awesome. Don't let them make you think otherwise.

arianapia said...

that is not nice at all! I love reading your blog and yours was one of the first ones I started reading! some people just need to complain and be rude and it's not fair and i feel sorry for them that they can't live a full happy life!

you rule. let them hate. and keep spreading joy! :)

Anna said...

You could look at this as a rite of passage- only the biggest and most popular blogs get people coming together to talk about them (mean or nice). :) you're in the big leagues! For the record, your blog is great. :)

Erika-Wife or Something Like It said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Anna said...

that is so mean and pointless. I love your blog and LOVE your writing, so don't stop!!! ( also, i love that Brave picture hahah :)

kimberly rae said...

i just want to echo what a few other people have said ...you know you've made it when people start talking crap for no reason!!

the most hilarious thing of all is that these people have this much time to sit around bad-mouthing people. get a life!

i couldn't get the forum to open so i couldnt read what they said, but it's got to be jealousy! i know i'm jealous! lol but i choose to live vicariously through you rather than to make my sad life seem better by putting yours down (ok, my life is sad, but i have to think these girls' must be if they have time to go to that website)

& you have never come across as snotty or know-it-all-ish!! the only vibe i've ever gotten is you love your hubs, your friends, your family and traveling! AND you love zara. lol!!

so keep doing what your doin and keep having such a positive response to these haters!

xo

kimberly rae said...

lol i meant to say my life ISNT sad. d'oh!

Jennifer said...

Daryl - please remember that this is THEIR issue, not yours. There are always going to be people that find fault with "fill in the blank here". Oh well. At the end of the day, the only people I believe I need to be accountable to are myself and God.

Based on what I've read you come across as a smart, caring, wonderful person. Don't let this get you down and please don't change a thing!!

xoxo

Ashlee said...

I have noticed -- not from personal comments on my blog -- seeing as I don't get ANY. But from personal experiance from 'Haters' in my real life, they don't like the fact that WE as writers and Bloggers can be Open and Honest about the things in our life and when its a negative experiances we STILL happen to share it with the world and try to see a POSITIVE outcome from it. It's all about envy.

I went through a similar experiance and I actually wrote a blog about it a while back if you want to read it called "My Blog is My Blog"; it could help and give you some insight:

http://lifeofashlee.blogspot.com/2011/11/my-blog-is-my-blog.html

Just keep doing what you are doing -- You have more Supporters and People who love you then those who are negative!

-Ashlee Michelle

Alex Butts said...

I cannot believe people waste their time in forums trashing people - it is beyond my comprehension. I'm sorry you were a victim of their hatred and stay strong, your blog is amazing and you have so many more people who love it!

Kris said...

I'm a fairly new follower but I love your blog! It just sounds like immature people who are unhappy with their own lives and have to bring others down. Don't ever stop writing! :)

sissysclosetxo.blogspot.com

Kelsea @ Pink Wonderland said...

Wow. That is just so obnoxious.

To whomever wrote this gem:
"Anonymous said...
Honestly why do you care? Does your life revolve around this blog? Put on your big girl panties and move on... "

You're right. None of us should care what anyone says about us, and caring about hurtful comments obviously means you have no life outside of the internet. Unlike people who leave anonymous rude comments on blogs. Those are the kind we need more of.

Erika-Wife or Something Like It said...

I think your blog is great and I love the way you write! It makes me excited to travel one day. And it's your blog, so they have no right to hate on what you say. Like you said, if you don't like it, stop reading. Some people!

Betsy said...

I simply don't understand people who write things like this. Sure, there are blogs and websites that annoy or frustrate me - you know how I deal with that? I DON'T VISIT THOSE BLOGS AND WEBSITES, and I don't spend my time thinking about them.

It's their energy and time they're wasting in hating on you, and you know what? Boo to them. Yes, it's unbelievably hurtful to read those things, but maybe you can take comfort in the fact that clearly these people have nothing better to do than to hate. You do - and you celebrate that every day on this blog.

Keep being yourself, girl! We love you.

Ana F. said...

Oh Daryl, don't even waste your time about things like that. There'll always be people that have nothing better to do with their lives than make mean comments about others. They do that because their life is so plain and shallow that they need to believe that others are like that too, so they can feel better about themselves.

You have a good attitude about it... Haters gonna hate. And truth is, we will never be able to please everybody. So we might as well just keep going and doing our thing :)

Kristen said...

Daryl

People are weird. Rise above it as you have done. And by all means, do not apologize. Its your blog and you get to do and say what you want. If they don't like it, then they shouldn't visit.

rach said...

ahhhh thats terrible. and I know personally that I can say all day long that sticks and stones can break my bones but words will never hurt is lies! I am pretty sensitive myself and it sucks to see such mean things written by strangers. I don't understand why people feel like they can hide behind the anonymity of the internet and say whatever they want to....gah! Try not to let it get to you though and don't let it stop you from blogging either!

Steph said...

Girl, your blog is awesome. I've never felt a negative or snotty vibe from anything that you've written and I adore the way you write. Sorry you had to come across something like that, though. There's literally no reason for anyone to be bashing you (or anyone else for that matter) in a forum like that. And please don't change a thing! Your blog should be representative of whatever it is that you want it to be. Don't let these crazies make you second guess yourself!

Kym said...

Oh my god, your face is so irritating that I can't even read anything you just wrote. :) Um, I have seen other bloggers mention this site as well, and I really don't think you have to take any of those comments to heart. I never once felt that you were snotty. Not even a touch of snooty! I know it must be terrible to read, but try to forget them and keep in mind that any publicity is good publicity, right? haha. Keep doing your thing; your blog is awesome!

xo
Kym
bitty.and.bunny

Lil' Bit and Nan said...

I'm proud of you Daryl. Handling this the "adult" way. You grew up a little bit today. Be proud of yourself. I love you my friend. Maybe I should be grateful for the lack of traffic my blog gets. I kind of like it that way.

Alyx said...

Ummm whoever is selling all that haterade should probably stop.

Dearest Lou said...

I'm so sorry that this happened to you Daryl! That's just horrible! I tried going to the site but it looks like they got rid of it (: I love your blog, keep doing what you're doing girl!

Miss Tallulah Porkchop said...

I'm sorry you had to go through that. Those people should be ashamed of themselves.

Your blog is lovely and you are very sweet. They're probably jealous. If they hate your blog so much, WHY ARE THEY ALL READING IT?

GRR... PEOPLE LIKE THAT MAKE ME ANGRY.

Now, chin up and have a great day.

Diana said...

HAHAHHA i love the haters gonna hate pic from Brave. Stay positive, be positive :)

Mimi Finerty said...

To bad mouth someone and effectively bully them on the internet is in my eyes, pathetic. Your blog and writing has been a real inspiration for me. As an expat I like to read the experiences of others similar to myself and the way you write really resonates with me. So I wanted to say thank you and dont stop writing.... because my blog list would be empty without you.

Sara Louise said...

I am in shock. Seriously, in shock. I CANNOT BELIEVE that a bunch of people sit around typing negative stuff like that about you (or any other blogger for that matter). It's ridiculous. It's juvenile and horrible. I'm so happy that you wrote this post because I think you've handled this situation wonderfully.
Don't let the b*stards keep you down!
Bisous de Provence xx

Jennie said...

I actually found you from that website just now! I've never ever once posted there, but I read it occasionally to see what people are saying about blogs I enjoy. I am downright TERRIFIED that they'll find my blog and rip me a new one, hahahaha. I'm sure they could dedicate an entire forum to how irritating I could be. It hurts and it sucks, but hey, at least you got one new follower from it? I'll have to read around, but anyone Alyx likes is probably a great blog to follow. :)

StephanieKelly said...

I would just like to say that I actually looked at your about me to see if you are actually 19 because I had assumed we were around the same age (I'm 22). I love your blog because you conduct yourself in such a charming and ladylike fashion not often found in someone of your/our age group. I hope that you know that you have a fan/blog friend in me and I adore this little space on the internet and sincerely encourage you to keep doing exactly what you are doing! <3

Lindsay Frost said...

Oh my God, this is unbelievable. And for someone to say they can't read your blog because your face is just too irritating, well that is just plain evil. It's absurd to have a forum dedicated to being mean to people. And why bother taking the time to read a blog if you don't like the content. There is no need to leave all that negativity and nastiness around. Some people are just immature and don't know any better. Do not for one second be bothered by anything they have to say. If that is what they do with their time, then their opinions certainly are not worth listening to. Keep up the great work on your blog, and always stay true to you.

Rockster1039 said...

You're such a strong person, teach me your ways <3

LinkWithin

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...